Protect Your Joy

One of the hardest things to protect is your joy.

Just the other day, I was sitting at my desk at work and felt the negative energy lurking.

I started to notice all the things that annoy me in the office.

The loud noises, inconsiderate people, the people that talk to others all day, blah, blah, blah.

My joy was under attack, and it was happening fast!

I needed to get my mind right.

Not too long ago, we had to get a new water heater.

It decided to spring a leak on the inside and short out the circuit board.

No big deal, it happens, and we can get a new one.

I felt the irritation coming on that night, my joy was under attack.

I was pretty irritated with the water heater, but that’s no excuse, I get to choose how I handle it.

I’m going to divert for a second.

I’m in no way saying you should ignore your feelings, but you cannot let the negative feelings consume you and take over.

There’s a big difference between recognizing them and letting them consume you.

Ok, back to the original newsletter for today.

The two scenarios I mentioned above are examples that could happen to anybody on any given day.

It’s usually not the major incidents that steal our joy, but the little incidents that take place on the daily.

When I talk about protecting your joy, I’m also talking about protecting your peace.

This all starts with making the right choice.

You see, it’s so easy to get caught up in everything that irritates you.

I’ve been guilty of this for most of my adult life.

It’s a slippery slope once you get started down this path.

You start noticing everything that annoys you; someone’s laugh, someone talking too loudly, or the person complaining all the time, etc. (most of what I mentioned above but you can plug in your annoyances here).

If we allow ourselves to continue to keep sliding down that slope, the irritation will turn into negativity.

Negativity is harder to reverse.

This was one of the most challenging habits and mindsets I had to break.

Once upon a time, the incidents mentioned above would ruin my entire day.

It would send me into a tailspin of irritation, negativity, and anger.

I was miserable to be around.

What’s even worse, is when the victim mentality kicked in.

The world was against me, I can’t do anything right, why won’t anything ever go right for me, I’m such a failure, etc.

Recognize the irritation early so that you can do something about it.

Use irritation as a trigger to stop, assess your mindset and mood, and change directions if needed.

It all starts with self-awareness.

You must be aware of what you’re thinking about and how you’re feeling throughout the day.

Once you start recognizing the irritation coming on, the goal is to increase the time between when an event happens and your reaction to that event.

I call this the reaction buffer.

I find the best way to start increasing the reaction buffer is by learning to take a deep breath and relax my mind for a minute.

If you can remove yourself from the environment, that’s even better.

Taking a deep breath allows me to create a buffer between my thoughts and actions.

That’s the ultimate goal; we want to build that buffer between what happens to us and our reaction to it so that we don’t react to our emotions but have a minute to think about it first.

Once I take that deep breath, and give myself a buffer, the real work begins.

I remind myself that I have a choice in how I proceed forward.

I can choose to give into the irritation and become angry, or I can choose to let it go and focus on gratitude.

Gratitude is a great way to bring back the positive vibes.

Take five minutes and remind yourself of what you’re grateful for; your health, the fact that you can walk, your house, etc.

We have the power of choice in how we proceed forward.

It’s going to be very hard at first, but the more you practice your intentional power of choice, the better you become at it.

Sometimes, it’s a minute-by-minute battle, but it’s a battle worth fighting.

Stay positive and take action!

1. Thank you for reading, I truly appreciate your support!

2. If you would like to see more, check out my website at: marktoner80.wixsite.com/survivor-to-thriver.

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